The fear of being “Alone”

Being oneself, solitude, being by oneself. This all constitutes being alone. For some this means that there is a innate desire that we have to be with someone or be doing social activities. Without this “fix” they don’t know what they would become.

I did a bit of research on what this phenomena is and what words may explain it better. For the time that I spend on doing this, I found that the closest word that I found that fits is the “Autophobia“.

Autophobia (as defined as by dictionary.com) is simply “a fear of being alone or of one’s self”. I am sure that there maybe people that really seize up when they are by themselves and cannot stand it. There are obvious signs. However, I tend to think of degrees. Its not just as plain as good, or bad, white or black.

This means that people might have some form of Autophobia without feeling the clammy hands and a sweaty forebrow, BUT there maybe a tingly feeling that they should be with someone or do a social activity with their own knit group.

Sometimes I can see this where there has to be an event for every single “small” event that happens. Even to the level to say “we’ll meet just to hang“. What is it about hanging? I’ll tell you the dialog when people are just “hanging”:

A: “How was your day?”
B: “I am fine? How was yours?”
A: “Oh it was great, what are you doing tomorrow?”
B” I dunno…wanna hang?”

Ok it is a simplified case, and I am sure that there is more that goes with that, but the fact is that its a pretty plain session, which purpose is pointless.

There are benefits of being in solitude and perhaps exploring that may explain why people have the need to hang to perhaps avoid these moments. One article that I read (the author name eludes me) suggests that in our time of solitude we are able to reflect who we are and even learn about different things.

Is it possible that for those people that are constantly looking to socialise at every opportune moment trying to avoid this? I don’t know, but it would certainly interesting to see.

Fire back to me about this, I am certainly interested what others have to say about this essay or whether they could have some answers or perspectives.